It’s the first day of school for this bunch… and my first day for my online students as well. It’s a day I have both looked forward to and dreaded for the last six months. The number of decisions I have been responsible for during this pandemic sure have weighed heavy on my heart. I don’t know about you, but I crave options and hate them all at the same time. No one likes being told what to do, but at the same time, I abhor making decisions. And I am notorious for second guessing everything.
The past two years I really struggled with the decision about where to send the kids to school. Two years ago they attended a University model school, and last year they attended an amazing public school in our district. Both years the Lord blessed my choice so much that I knew that the decision I had made was from Him. And I never regretted it. Despite all my fears about public school, all three of them had the teachers that I prayed for, that were what each needed and I could not be more thankful for the environment they were in. And as a bonus, I got to work at their school a couple hours a week all year while keeping my university job!
But now we have come full circle. I decided early last year that I was going to keep them at the same school this year. I was so excited about the options for the teachers they could each have, and then the pandemic hit. My decision making/stressing started all over again… which leads us to today… the first week of four weeks of remote learning before we return to in person learning in September. To say I am sure about my decision would be a lie, but I know that when I have followed my gut in the past, I haven’t regretted it… so in the words of a dear friend, “I’m doing it scared…”
You Don’t Have to Have All the Answers Right Now
If you are like me and questioning your schooling decisions for this year… here’s what I want to tell you. There are very few decisions in parenting that I have been 100% sure of. Some of my greatest successes and my greatest failures as a parent have come from making choices I wasn’t totally sure about. Sometimes there aren’t great options, and the choices aren’t ones that we would ever have chosen for ourselves. It really is okay to “do it scared.” Bathe it in prayer, then live life, jump in with both feet and see where things go. If you realize down the road you need to switch things up, that’s okay. That may be the only way we get the confirmation that we are doing the right thing.
So we are starting out this school year with Philippians 4:6 as the verse for us to remember, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”
My days will be a little busier than I planned the next few weeks, but I am embracing every moment, and while I’m at it, I’ll be praying for you too! Whatever decision you made for this year: homeschooling, in person, or remote… I’m praying you get the confirmation you need that you are doing the right thing!